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CEPT for Tom - eyverska
January 26th, 2011
03:32 pm

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CEPT for Tom
Hey Gang,
Beloved is in a miserable blue funk between constant headaches, boredom, loneliness and depression.
He has not felt well enough to get out of the house. He has not felt well enough to work on his car (the weather has been of no help on this).
The dog likes me better. (hey, I get her out of the house at least once per week).
I do well taking care of the bills and the house. And getting him to doctor appointments. I keep my walls up and muddle on.
Himself was asleep when I got home. I fixed myself dinner. He wondered why I didn't fix him a burger too. (he was asleep). I gave him my breakfast earlier in the week when he got up when I was about to eat.
Beloved is dealing with hurt feelings as well as loneliness and depression. I don't deal well with what I can't fix. I am really good about blocking misery out. Otherwise I would loose my temper and say things I really shouldn't.
I am fine. I wallow in books. I get out to work and run errands. I call friends. They call me. We do things for each other. And I block the blue cooties so I don't catch them very often.
I just don't know what I can do for him anymore. He is on medication and gets counseling.

Current Location: work
Current Mood: concerned

(9 comments | Leave a comment)

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From:janetmiles
Date:January 26th, 2011 09:48 pm (UTC)
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That's really hard. The headaches sound pretty debilitating, which can contribute to depression, which makes it harder to care about anything and feeds the loneliness. The loneliness and depression probably aren't helping the pain, either. I wish there were some step in there where he could break the cycle.

I'd almost be inclined to suggest, if he'd be willing to go through with it, a short period of in-patient treatment or intensive out-patient treatment, where he'd have a regular schedule of having to get up and do things whether he felt like it or not.

Or some kind of contract with himself, where he'd commit to doing At Least One Thing each day.

I dunno. It's really hard. Depression sucks a whole lot.
[User Picture]
From:eyverska
Date:January 27th, 2011 03:42 pm (UTC)
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The headaches are debilitating. Your advice is great and I appreciate your wisdom and friendship. He did pretty well last night.
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From:janetmiles
Date:January 26th, 2011 09:49 pm (UTC)
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And, dammit, I meant to say that I have a whole lot of respect for you, for keeping on in the face of such stress. You're a stronger woman than I would be, I think, in similar circumstances.
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From:eyverska
Date:January 27th, 2011 03:44 pm (UTC)
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Hey, karma balances. And I had a good counselor and listened to her. I self-medicate by reading a lot of fiction and being elsewhere. Which doesn't help Tom a lot.
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From:tsjafo
Date:January 26th, 2011 11:57 pm (UTC)
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Prayers and good thoughts on the way. *hugs*

I'm housebound too, email me and I'll send my number, he can call when he's got nothing to do.
[User Picture]
From:eyverska
Date:January 27th, 2011 03:45 pm (UTC)
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I will have him do that. My e-mail is yrinorris at gmail dot com .
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From:jiggercat
Date:January 27th, 2011 12:47 am (UTC)
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Wish I had a magic wand to make it all better.....much love & hugs to you both
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From:eyverska
Date:January 27th, 2011 03:45 pm (UTC)
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You are magic. Your friendship is valued.
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From:jiggercat
Date:January 28th, 2011 04:01 am (UTC)
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Awwwwwwww......*blush*...thank you
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